Divorce? NEVER!

Someone recently posted something on Facebook that really cut to the core with me.  It was not only what they said but the way the said it and the posts that followed.  (there is something to be said about using all caps, but that could be a whole different blog topic) Anyways, they posted a link to a story about a failing marriage, then posted that they don't believe in divorce and will never get one.  At first glance I nodded and agreed, but then I could feel a fire build inside.  As someone who's been divorced I think I started to take her words to heart.  Did she really think people get married thinking, "well, if this doesn't work out I'll just get a divorce" does she not see from the people and relationships around her that no matter how perfect for each other people may be or how religious they are, sometimes shit happens.  Life happens, people change, and for one reason or another it doesn't work out.  But just because a marriage doesn't work out it doesn't mean they failed.

No one can ever say never, because you can't predict the future.  Nor can you say you don't "believe" in it, it is a real thing, it's not the tooth fairy.  You can believe in the "institution" of marriage, you can say you'll always do everything within your power to maintain a healthy, loving relationship, and you can wish, want, or will yourself a lifetime of happy marriage, but you can't say that you'll never get a divorce.  I don't wish the divorce process and heartache upon anyone, and I hope I never have to watch a friend go through one, but in America where the divorce rate is 50% and some reports put it closer to 75% in the state of California, the chances are most people will divorce.

There is still the percentage that doesn't get a divorce, it is possible to have a marriage that lasts, it takes a lot of hard work, love, communication, support, common goals, and most importantly individuality.  Without love for yourself and strong individual life, you won't be able to contribute healthily to a relationship.  It's knowing that divorce IS a possibility that should keep you waking up each morning asking yourself, "what can I do today to show my partner how much I love them"